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(With the disclaimer that I wrote this some days ago based mostly on performances in the national finals, so don’t blame me if anyone changed their act to blow bubbles out of their ears, it’s…)
The usual unsolicited thoughts on Eurovision Semi-Final #1
==============ICELAND
Stompy, shouty six-eight electrofolk by siblings in bacofoil tracksuits. Gets by on force of personality more than the (ironically) underpowered “Power” of last year ever could or did, and the return to singing in Icelandic is pleasing, but those boys’ voices will do well to command the auditorium. Accusations by Israel of Róa plagiarising Hatunat HaShana (who in their right mind would plagiarise a track co-performed by a tax dodger tarnished by association with historic statutory rape allegations?) aren’t worth the bother.POLAND
I love the fact that this entry has compelled me to revisit Justyna Steczkowska’s Sama, which finished 18th in her one previous appearance in the Contest back in 1995. The reasons that piece of minor-key folk-tinged trip hop may have been overlooked back then – downbeat, melancholic, introverted – read like positive boons now in a Eurovision era more receptive to shade as well as light. Right song, wrong era? Gaja sees Justyna demonstrate more of her sizeable vocal range for longer, as well as some entry level physical acrobatics; and if I’m not enjoying it as much as its predecessor quite yet, there’s time. A frontrunner if YouTube and Spotify traffic alone count for anything.SLOVENIA
The sincerity isn’t in question, and How Much Time Do We Have Left navigates its way through a similar scenario to Wires by Athlete just that bit more skilfully lyrically. The song suffers, however, from its failure to decide half way through whether to hit the button marked lung-bursting, euphoric finale or continue to bump around in a more low-key manner. Reconciling Klemen the earnest singer facing the worst projections of his wife’s cancer diagnosis with Klemen the comedy impressionist (with one recent instance of blackface, no less) isn’t the easiest, either.ESTONIA
I’ve expounded at length in these reviews over the years about comedy songs which land, and those which don’t. I wonder whether you can guess into which silo I’ll be dropping this exercise in baiting Italians by a performer with an extensive résumé of hairy-palmed sexist material and a political moral compass on the blink? Disappointing to learn he’s collaborated with Käärijä of Cha Cha Cha fame, really.SPAIN
Unfinished business for Melodía Ruiz Gutiérrez (for it is she), having won over the jury but not the public in Spain’s 2009 selection process. Possibly a blessing, that, considering how many teenagers this Contest can chew up and spit out (not everyone’s a Nicole or Sandra Kim), and the 2025 model of Melody has the pipes and presence to do a song justice on this stage. Pity the material isn’t more memorable, however; some nods to Loreen’s Tattoo among the obligatory Flamenco guitar licks, but it’s all just a bit too wordy and fussy for what it needs to be.UKRAINE
The longer Ukraine’s battle for survival against Russia endures, so it becomes harder to resist unwittingly patronising their ongoing strong showings in Eurovision as incredible achievements in spite of everything. Safer, then, just to deal with the song completely on its merits: Ziferblat are very different to anything representing Ukraine in recent memory; they offer up an engaging, labyrinthine melodic rock number that stays with one longer than many other entries this year; and they wouldn’t be going deep into the contest out of turn, having missed out in the national vote two years previously.SWEDEN
A year off from the usual precision-tooled, high production-valued dance or pop? Not sure I saw that coming. An altogether more wholesome novelty piece than Estonia’s, all the more amusing for the three members of KAJ remaining soberly suited throughout (more gratuitous acts might have stripped off once the sauna appeared on stage), though not as laugh out loud funny as, say, a Guildo Horn. Another collector’s item for lovers of local dialects in Eurovision, mind, being rendered in the Finland Swedish Vörå variety. We’ll get a UK entry in Sheffield speak yet.PORTUGAL
A longing for home by Madeirans displaced either to mainland Portugal, or else further afield, as dictated by work or study. As with the likes of Salvador Sobral and Maro in the recent past, a Portuguese entry with not a hint of histrionics or hysterics about it, albeit it rather goes missing in its middle third. Not as compelling as it might have been, then, but certainly pretty, and mercifully betraying more of NAPA’s Beatles influences than their Chilli Peppers ones.NORWAY
Quite a few entries in the Eurovision bingo card crossed off at once here, from the copious use of fire in the staging to the twelvety hundredth recycling of some of the motifs from Tarkan Tevetoğlu’s (later Holly Valance’s) Kiss Kiss. Largely the work of nineteen-year-old performer Kyle Alessandro, and if not advertising his worth as prodigious a teen talent as, say, For You-era Prince or We Could Send Letters-era Roddy Frame, it’s far from without merit.BELGIUM
By all accounts a love song to Belgium’s rave culture, albeit the rave culture of now, so old buggers like me ought not get excited all of a sudden and expect a facsimile of Injected with a Poison by Praga Khan or similar. The neon red and black stage setting feels as if it’s been done to death in the recent past, something which surely won’t be lost on those required to judge on such matters. The song is a joy, however – pounding, irresistible EDM with two perfectly executed leaps into a sustained falsetto vocal. Before the Party’s Over’s mystifying failure to make the Final last year surely won’t be repeated with this.ITALY
The bullied kid emerges informed by his past rather than remaining a prisoner of it, able to interpret his fragility as a strength. Even if I hadn’t cared much for this song, I’d still have felt seen by it. An Italian rock track, yes, but from a more poised, delicate, softer end of the spectrum than Måneskin, glam get-up and strings and all. Lucio Corsi’s earliest forays into music apparently had something in common with Gabriel-era Genesis; I think I’d have quite liked him to create something that tries to condense Supper’s Ready into three minutes.AZERBAIJAN
Maroon 5 warning! Maroon 5 warning! This is not a test! This is not a drill! Offensively inoffensive, and I’ve heard too much of the electric saz in Omar Souleyman’s irresistible electro-dabke now to settle for Mamagama’s weedy acoustic equivalent.SAN MARINO
Probably my favourite San Marino entry musically since Serhat, the jolly singalonga chorus having plenty to do with that, along with an altogether less snidey celebration of all things Italian than Tommy bloody Cash. I surely won’t be the first person this week to suggest that the staging is a weak point, however. If it’s a given that Gabry Ponte (formerly one third of Eiffel 65, all you fellow old people out there) wouldn’t be able to command much of a presence from behind his mixing desk, the singer (hidden behind a bird mask) and instrumentalists could at least have been pushed front and centre rather than apologetically assembled next to him. A performance which feels delivered in spite of you, rather than to you, which is a pity.ALBANIA
Where once the Contest’s tracks advocating world peace and tolerance would be, without fail, yer simple four-four anthems with huge choruses, here we have the same message but delivered by Albanian immigrants from Italy in the form of rumbling, brooding, orchestral folktronica. Note also the most lugubrious spoken word break, which could easily be misconstrued as menace without a lyrics sheet to hand. Not sure many people will be indifferent about this one.NETHERLANDS
With all charges leveled against him following his expulsion from Eurovision last year having ultimately been dropped in the summer, I’d have assumed the path had been smoothed for Joost Klein to have another crack at the Contest this year with his national broadcaster AVROTROS’s blessing; and reading up further it does appear that this very nearly happened. Eurovision’s loss is, in the end, our loss as well, Congolese refugee Claude’s chanson-cum-dance-pop proving more winsome from a backstory perspective (fell in love with the Contest whilst being processed) than a musical one.CROATIA
…Which sees Croatia swapping the single-minded musical juggernaut of Rim Tim Tagi Dim for something closer to Bambie Thug’s stylistic gear changes and darker demeanour. Poison Cake has certainly already achieved on a par with Doomsday Blue in one regard, some local detractors having similarly branded it satanic, and you’d want to wish Marko Bošnjak best of luck in the Contest given both that backlash and a slew of homophobic abuse. And if the song just doesn’t work as well as Bambie’s effort, the nursery rhyme interludes and industrial screams proving just too incompatible a juxtaposition, it’s hard to knock the intellectual intent of a song which must surely include the first ever use of “genuflect” in the Contest. Diggi-loo Diggi-ley this is not.SWITZERLAND
Eight years on, as close to an Amar Pelos Dois-inspired entry as I can remember, certainly in terms of delicacy and (barring a slightly overdone orchestral flourish near the end) restraint. Some of the hype around Zoë Më’s style as “unique pop-poetry” probably isn’t helpful for the performer; it’s some pretty, not unwelcome respite from the thuds and screeches elsewhere, and ought to be enjoyed just as that.CYPRUS
The lyrics are a riddle, if less in the style of Nik Kershaw and more that of a clue in Going for Gold – the thought suddenly occurs to me whether this track is a tribute to Henry Kelly? Maybe not. More stately brooding for the first third, before suddenly deciding to wheel out the EDM beats and Faithless motifs, making up for that lost time reasonably adequately.gc
Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Very, very good, Ginger.
At least, I think it is, but it’s all relative.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
As icebreakers went, it was very… him.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
I didn’t get to Cheltenham last Friday, but the running of the race for the late Jonathan Neesom evoked some memories of him, both direct and indirect. I share them here, along with praise for a couple of the evening’s winners.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Hello again,
Strikes me there are one or two on here who may be able to help me out. Could it be confirmed who the racecourse commentator on this clip is, please?
https://twitter.com/horsevault/status/1569220711872356352
My money’s on Bryan Firth, but having never heard Harry Beeby or Michael White in action and knowing both were still active on the then RTS roster around the same time (if all three not for much longer), I’m reluctant to guess too hastily.
Similarly, who can provide a positive ID for this gentleman, please?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVME0Mk-2t0&t=1s
I’m thinking John Cotterell, ubiquitous in the West Country for a couple of decades at least. My personal racecard archive confirms he was the duty commentator at two Newton Abbot meetings I attended in 1987 and 1989; but as those were meetings from the time I’d just wander deep into the infield to take photos at runners crossing fences, oblivious to the sounds over the PA system, I wouldn’t have the vaguest recollection of what John would have sounded like on those days.
I’ve managed to put names to voices of a few callers over the extended lifespan of this thread, but new questions emerge all the time as long-lost or forgotten footage continues to be unearthed. And as for the number of racecards I’ve scrutinised on eBay… Well, it gets something done whilst I’m sitting up at 3am and waiting for the kids to doze back to sleep.
Thanks in advance!
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
However, is talk of a lifetime ban fair or realistic? As Lydia Hislop said in yesterday’s podcast, Mick Quinn mistreated horses that were alive. He only got a three year ban and is now training again.
There may be an issue of scale. From memory, Kamil Mahdi got warned off for ten years and a lifetime ban from caring for horses (one he was trying to find ways to circumvent as recently as 2013, to the horror of the Scargill family who’d exposed him).
Without having yet checked to confirm, I assume Mick Quinn’s mistreatment either concerned fewer horses or was seen as less systemic as Mahdi’s. Regardless, I imagine it’s been pretty hard for some to enjoy in isolation the achievements of the game front-runner Pink Sheets in mares’ hurdles this autumn and winter, whilst still remembering her trainer’s previous misdemeanours.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Search Youtube for Wocket Woy to get as much Mattie Batchelor as you could possibly ever need. Sixty-nine comedy mini-films of him on there, and counting.
He also made a guest appearance on Hole in the Wall, BBC1’s conversion of the Japanese gameshow Minasan no Okage desita, in autumn 2008. I’d tell you exactly which episode and date, except that the guest list for each episode on Wikipedia contains the guests for the US and Australian conversions instead. Duh.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
I’m guessing it didn’t lure you away from the likes of Plumpton on too many winter Mondays during your ORS days, Paul!
It felt like I was making up about 2% of the paying audience on the day of its first jumpers’ bumper fixture almost exactly eight years ago. But, y’know, it was a clear, bright winter’s afternoon with some fine sport and lots of friendly faces; and until they ruined it with a second such fixture last year, I could legitimately claim to have seen all of the jumps racing held under Rules at Dunstall Park since 2002.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Sorry, ap- I meant during the turf flat season. AW flat racing is fine during the winter.
The unusual circumstances of 2020 are likely best ignored for analytical purposes, but the significant number of artificial surface meetings held during the summer months in the preceding years that attracted runner totals in the 80s, 90s and even 100s does demand closer scrutiny.
There’s clearly a sizeable cohort of trainers out there prepared to use them. Is that a consequence of too few turf Flat meetings being programmed at certain pinch points of the summer (for the very reasons of course husbandry ap referred to)? Or does it speak of an ever greater trust among trainers in the quality and integrity of an AS surface versus a turf equivalent that may have been chewed up, overwatered, etc.?
Or is it simply the case that as so many horses will have been trained on an AS at home, that racing on an AS even in the height of summer is regarded as being as natural (an ironic choice of word in this context, I appreciate) to the horses in question as at any other time of year?
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
The argument still applies even if we’re just talking about the turf flat season. There simply aren’t enough tracks to handle the number of fixtures required by a) the horse population and b) the deal with the bookies.
And that’s even with both tracks at Newmarket divided down the middle to provide two separate racing surfaces – and similar arrangements at Haydock and Nottingham where they have two tracks available for sprints.
…plus, ap, numerous racing lines available around big, wide tracks such as Newbury, Ffos Las and Doncaster. And still these aren’t necessarily enough.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
I would certainly mourn Wolverhampton’s passing were it to come to that, and the arguments you’ve raised for its retention are certainly strong. I can vouch for the decent facilities, too – not yet three decades old, so spring chickens compared to those of many of its peers.
I suppose the worries are that ARC have already shown their true colours where closing racecourses for housing development opportunities are concerned, and of that course bits of the site were already being sold off for non-racing purposes six years before ARC even hoved into view. Fundamentally, and perhaps worryingly, it’s a lucrative-looking site in an urban setting.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Whenever the argument comes up about “too many meetings”, it tends to ignore the fact that racing’s income is derived from the number of meetings, and we need to acknowledge that there is a place for races which are tailored to satisfy the needs of the (generally moderate) equine population.
Arguably more races need to be framed to give our lesser lights a better chance of a run! The menu needs to be balanced, and excellence rewarded, so I quite see how some more prestigious events would want to gravitate to weekend slots. You don’t need to bet on them if you don’t want to, but I often think it is easier to spot the least-bad horse in a bad race than the best horse in an elite event.
Very much agree with the above, not least the last line, even before considering that my single biggest win last year came in a 0-55 classified at Chelmsford. I’ve never been convinced that a mooted reduction of moderate races would result in a commensurate reduction of the number or percentage of moderate horses, but rather just hide more of them out of sight.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Mike if you want to put summer jumps into a one race summary then the Summer National, although Gray really sums it up with the going being too hard to jump on
For the avoidance of doubt, RedRum, can I perhaps gently point out that that was actually the opposite of what I was saying.
I’m a fierce advocate of summer jumping, Summer Cup and all (the Summer National hasn’t existed for a while now, either by name (since 2012) or race distance (since 2009)), and with few concerns regarding the veracity of its surfaces on account of the watering requirements mentioned previously.
Hard ground hasn’t existed as an entity in summer jumping at any stage of its now 25-year existence, nor firm ground for the vast majority of that. Wincanton or Taunton or Exeter, however…
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
I STRONGLY dislike All Weather Jumps, the best thing they did was get rid of it. Also summer jumps as the ground might be too firm for them.
Three weeks shy of the 27th anniversary of the last ever artificial surface hurdle in this country (and War Beat’s conspicuously graphic demise), I think you can rest assured that that mode of racing isn’t coming back any time soon. Barring a steeplechase on dirt at Honzrath in Germany most years if not quite annually, there’s negligible appetite for it elsewhere in mainland Europe either.
The mention of summer jumping reminds me of another reason for my dislike of that Chepstow October meeting, and more broadly of a lot of jumps racing in October generally. Provision of sufficient watering facilities is an absolute prerequisite for courses wanting to race over jumps from June to September – no watering, no fixtures granted.
No such edict exists for October fixtures, when in many cases it probably ought to. Only last year, the good to soft ground promised for the Chepstow fixture proved to be anything but, with conditions officially changed to good two races into the Friday card of what is nowadays a two-day fixture. Even that analysis didn’t sit entirely right with the evidence of a raft of late non-runners and a 103-rated animal breaking the 3m chase course record (with the actual race distance the same as advertised).
Simply put, I’d be far happier running something around Cartmel in mid-July than Chepstow nearly three months later.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Indeed yes, Drone, for nine of the last eleven years including the last seven and a half. Unless circumstances necessitate or accommodate (delete as applicable) a move to Scotland or Darmstadt in the future, we’re Sheffo for good now and will be very happy to remain so.
Covid hasn’t sunk its claws into this neck of the woods as much as many, it’s true, such that we were in a lower tier than anywhere else in Yorkshire immediately prior to the present lockdown. We’re quite good at doing as we’re told around here, all in all.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
The moment the Southwell surface switch was announced, I thought this might spell the beginning of the end of Wolverhampton. Anyone else?
Three other AS courses in the ARC portfolio to absorb Wolvo’s fixtures, two with a straight course that Wolvo doesn’t offer and two using Tapeta or about to. It adds up.
The new Southwell surface needs to prove itself capable of withstanding the inevitable much higher usage.
Assuming it answers those questions of it affirmatively, however, and that the site’s previous flooding issues have been fixed for good, the end for Wolvo isn’t hard to imagine.That’ll sadden me, as in its previous dual-purpose form it was the venue of the first race meeting I ever went to, back in March 1983. It’s also the AS track I’ve fared best at punting-wise over the years, and I doubt I’m alone in that.
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
Oh and ta for the kind words, Nathan and Friendsheep! No idea how long this stay will last, as life has been getting in the way of such Web 2.0-related pursuits something rotten of late; but as the great philosopher Lord Tommo of the Crown Inn, Bawtry once said, let’s see what happens…
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Jeremy Grayson. Son of immigrant. Adoptive father of two. Metadata librarian. Freelance point-to-point / horse racing writer, analyst and commentator wonk. Loves music, buses, cats, the BBC Micro, ale. Advocate of CBT, PACE and therapeutic parenting. Aspergers.
