The home of intelligent horse racing discussion
The home of intelligent horse racing discussion

fastest latin mass in the land?

Home Forums Lounge fastest latin mass in the land?

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)
  • Author
  • #6474
    • Total Posts 608

    Catholic priest, Father Brown in Newcastle, GB, can do a latin mass with gregoran chant sung by a chior in 35 minutes flat, with an average time of 45 minuts flat when he does a reading and preaches.

    Can any other priest you lot know if clock such a fast time for a latin mass?

    Baring in mind that the diocis is also home too a priest who part owns a horse called Redemption..

    Jim JTS
    • Total Posts 841

    This one from Father Frail took around ten minutes :- :lol:

    Father Frail at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.

    After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.

    The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. if I start to get nervous, I take a sip."

    So next Sunday Father Frail took the monsignor’s advice.

    At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm.

    Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on the door:

    1. Sip the Vodka, don’t gulp.
    2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
    3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
    4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
    5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
    6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J. C.
    7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the Spook.
    8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the **** out of him.
    9. When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey,don’t say he was stoned off his ass.
    10. We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."
    11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "Take this and eat it for it is my body." He did not say "Eat me"
    12. The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry,"
    13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.
    14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter’s, not a Peter pulling contest at St. Taffy’s!

    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.