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Kauto Star article

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  • #880
    Andrew HughesAndrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    If I could beg the indulgence of the forum once more…

    In my ongoing attempt to escape my current tedious occupation, I am trying to put together a portfolio of written work, in the (possibly vain) hope of somehow earning a living or at least half a living through writing on racing (amongst other things).

    As a start I have set up a blog and posted up my first article (on Kauto Star). Please feel free to have a look via the link below. Any feedback at all, no matter how critical will be welcome as it is all valuable.

    I should say that at the very least, I have enjoyed writing the thing, though this does not of course guarantee that anyone will enjoy reading it.

    Thanks in advance to anyone who takes the time to read it.

    #39246
    davidjohnson
    Member
    • Total Posts 4491

    Not sure if you are too old or not but check out this link.

    Martins Wills writing awards for under 26

    #39247
    Andrew HughesAndrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    Appreciate the link, David, thanks for passing that on. Unfortunately, I’m about 7 years too old for that. Though I can’t complain too much as writing is one area of life where you are still considered young in your thirties.

    #39248
    Aragorn
    Member
    • Total Posts 2208

    Good stuff Aranalde…

    PS He fell in the champion chase last year.

    #39249
    Andrew HughesAndrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    Can’t believe I missed that – duly corrected. Thanks Aragorn

    #39252
    tooting
    Member
    • Total Posts 379

    Aranalde,

    I actually linked to your blog last night out of idle curiosity and thoroughly enjoyed it. I was going to pm to say so but this thread renders that redundant.

    How about a follow-up article on Walsall throwing away the Division 1 championship, (and in the process killing off the accumulator that’s been keeping me warm all winter)!

    #39254
    DroneDrone
    Participant
    • Total Posts 5112

    A nicely composed screed as would be expected from one of TRFs better wordsmiths. Hope Jackane24 has read it.

    Personally I’d have thought Kauto Star’s remarkable (IMO) recovery from his blunder was worthy of a little more scrutiny and hyperbole.

    Achilleus rather than Achilles may be the sensu stricto translation from the Greek but smacks a little of ‘clever’ pomposity.

    I suggest you try and locate John Oaksey’s wonderful piece on Fred Winter’s ride on Mandarin in the Grand Steeplechase de Paris. In my view the definitive example of how to succesfully generate the atmosphere of a horse race in print.

    Keep ’em coming. Cheltenham Festival blogs in the offing presumably.<br>

    #39256
    davidbrady
    Member
    • Total Posts 3901

    Hi Aranalde

    I enjoyed your article, which is well-written like most of your posts here.

    It is a little floury though for the likes of the RP IMO but that would depend on what sort of audience/publication you are aimed at.

    Keep up the good work

    #39257
    apracing
    Participant
    • Total Posts 3087

    Quote: from davidbrady<br> <br>It is a little floury though

    <br>A plain article, or a self-raising story ?

    AP

    #39260
    Grey Desire
    Participant
    • Total Posts 1877

    Coat!!!!

    #39264
    Andrew HughesAndrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    Thanks all for the comments, constructive and encouraging – I would expect nothing less from this forum.

    I think, concious of the fact that I have no journalistic training, I have tried to err on the side of the flowery and entertaining rather than the factual (or the accurate, it turns out). In fact, I probably could have gone further down that road and Drone’s comments in particular have given me plenty to think about (I will certainly look up John Oaksey’s piece). It is also fair to say that I could do with being a little more focused on the audience I am aiming at.

    I will stick to racing for now and hopefully post up some more articles in the coming weeks.

    And Tooting, keep the faith, your accumulator is safe. We haven’t been playing all that badly, just had a couple of poorish results against decent teams. There may be another defeat or two in the offing and a drop into second place, before we resume our rightful place at the top of the league (albeit on goal difference)

    (Edited by Aranalde at 6:03 pm on Feb. 19, 2007)

    #39265
    Lovely Lady
    Member
    • Total Posts 160

    hi Andrew,

    I took the trouble.   Rather liked the floury tone but a bit of a change of pace there after the first paragraph, which was abrupt I felt and made the whole article a little unbalanced. Also it seemed  Arkle-esque to me and as yet  Kauto Star doesn’t merit such glorification.   I did feel you were glorifying the horse and treating him like some cloned creature who should be scolded for inexplicably putting a foot wrong here and there.  

    May I ask, has Alastair Down influenced you at all?  seriously ?

    Do let us know when you write another and good luck with it. The fact you enjoy tea and cakes will stand you in good stead I’m sure:biggrin:  

    by the way, what happened to your goalie ? <br>

    (Edited by Lovely Lady at 6:51 pm on Feb. 19, 2007)

    #39266
    apracing
    Participant
    • Total Posts 3087

    <br>Aranalde,

    Funnily enough, I also started trying to work out if Aranalde was some sort of anagram for Mr Down. Too many adjectives for my taste and not enough humour, but then any man that lists me alongside E M Forster and Dylan Thomas is bound to be confused in matters of literary style!

    AP <br>

    #39267
    Andrew HughesAndrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    Lovely Lady

    I haven’t been conciously influenced by Alastair Down, but it can’t be ruled out. I take your point about the change of pace. I was going for that to a certain extent, but it maybe didn’t quite come off. I was also slightly concerned there was a little too much hyperbole there, though I was genuinely impressed by the way Kauto Star travelled in that race. That said, it is the first article I’ve attempted on racing so I suppose its a question of striking the right tone. My relative lack of roots in the sport may lead me from time to time to lack historical perspective, so it is something I will have to watch.

    As for your aspersions regarding the rock that is Clayton Ince, I would remind you that he has the club record for the highest number of clean sheets (though that may be not saying a great deal). And every goalkeeper palms one into his own net direct from a corner once in a while. (At least, every Walsall keeper does)

    AP

    When I’ve a little more practice, I hope humour will enter into my writing more often, since those are the sort of writers I admire. However, I think that to make people laugh is the hardest skill of all and it needs to be done well or not at all.

    The Inside Track is the first book I ever read on racing or betting. Had it been a stinker, I could easily have drifted away from the sport. Instead it was a fascinating, educational and uplifting read. So if I ever get to inflict my writing on the wider public, it will all be your fault.

    Mind you, I liked the Wombles too.

    #39271
    NWRA
    Member
    • Total Posts 259

    It flows well, and proves that you have the skill to write professionally (when you find a subject).

    Generally, I think you need to ask yourself after every article: do you want the reader to judge the point(s) your trying to make, or to judge your vocabulary and your knowledge of Greek mythology? Obviously, it should be the former. So, I would concentrate on that (i.e., making interesting points), and not trying to be the next Nabokov.

    I would practice writing a weekly or twice-weekly column, which responds to recent events in an original way (based on the format of the columns in The RP)? because the kind of article that you’re written (and which Jackane24 used to write) is an oddity – what is it? I’ve never seen The RP carry a general piece like that?

    Also, it would be good practice; could you write about Winston’s fall from grace, etc, without feeling that you’re repeating what has already been said by everyone else?

    Finally, I wouldn’t try to be funny, unless a punchline naturally suggests itself. There are few things more annoying than forced humour (its what makes nearly every music magazine so unreadable); as you say, ‘it needs to be done well or not at all’ (with that kind of awareness, you should be fine).<br>

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