dogman

[gamble]

I haven’t seen him for months now.
I thought I caught a glimpse
of him outside Weatherspoons
sporting a number one.

It wans’t him
Dogman looked a bit
like a dog for dogsakes,
why would he cut his hair
down to a fuzz ?

Last sighting was carrying
one or two tesco bags
along a main street
in an easterly direction.

Bad form dogman,
but I suppose
you have to eat
and go round the
occasional bend.

[Mr. Pilsen]

Is he a plumber? Anyway, I’m guessing eight krones. Can’t be far out?

[gamble]

No halfway right
I am on my fourth

Little is indeed known of dogman

[Mr. Pilsen]

Fair enough

[gamble]

He used to stand
on hard conc reet
about the fourth
level up
not the best view
but sufficiently good for
a weight or form man.
Ordinary coat with a collar
sometimes up sometimes down.

But when they sniffed the final bend
the aquiline nose would
stretch slightly and the
eyes would peel
and the brow would fill
with determination
and he would raise his whole
body height about one inch –
not too strange all considered
were it not for the fact his feet
were still planted full square
on the hard conc reet

He wasn’t old enough to
have had his knees worked on
by the Japanese so maybe
his stretching ability
was down to pilates
or his work in the gym
and those few secret videos
of Nellie Kim.

[gamble]

A very rare sighting indeed !
Dogman was sighted last friday
at 1833 at the bargain counter
in Tesco.
A very cold night
he had eight items
to select from
and he took a long
Romford 750 metres
and Moses could have split
the sea or ran through
it in the time he dallied
his dog eyes and
pincered his eyebrows
up and down

at it

Problem is he gets
lost after six

There was a shadowy
figure behind him
watching his every move
yes you’ve guessed
right, it was the detective
in aspect tweed
dressed in a lamb sauce.

In the end he went for
a Tikka curry;
a smallish square
packet about six by four
with an appealing £2.00
dog ticket.

He actually did the dog
just as he hit
the self-service
and walked briskly
out swinging one
plastic bag, but not
a heavy swing as he
was wearing pukka
North Face and you can’t
swing with North Face.
It was not the expected
two bags
but a quiet night in
which beggars the
old form or
weight question
Has he lost his old bag
has he lost his

bitch

?

[Author]

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