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Crapping pigeons

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 19 total)
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  • #4462
    betlarge
    Participant
    • Total Posts 2668

    I’m trying to make the most of a few days of summer by sitting outside on the patio.

    Unfortunately, pigeons crap on me all the time whilst sitting on my TV arial on the roof (I’ve heard the gags about what good critics they must be, thanks).

    How do you get rid of the little feckers?

    Mike

    #105334
    Drone
    Participant
    • Total Posts 5123

    Having spent many a fruitless hour in my veg plot devising ingenious methods to prevent a bountiful winter harvest of cabbages and brussels sprouts from being garnished with pigeon turd I’ve come to the conclusion the only effective method of ridding yourself of ol’ Columba is the judicious use of an AK-47.

    #105335
    Andrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    Learn to imitate the call of the Peregrine Falcon

    #105336
    gamble
    Participant
    • Total Posts 2728

     :old:

    shoot the crap out of them<br> and enjoy a smudge free day

    #105337
    dave jay
    Member
    • Total Posts 3386

    Move the seat from beneath the TV arial and be at one with nature .. unless you have a very small area to sit in and then you’ve had it really, a brolly perhaps ?

    #105338
    sberry
    Member
    • Total Posts 1801

    or for a more pigeon-friendly solution, have the arial moved or wear a hat

    #105339
    betlarge
    Participant
    • Total Posts 2668

    Thank-you for all your suggestions.  Clearly, I have stumbled across a branch meeting of the RSPB.

    I like Gamble’s idea.

    All I need is a large gun.

    Mike

    #105340
    dave jay
    Member
    • Total Posts 3386

    It is illegal to shot a bird .. unless you belong to the royal family and then it’s compulsary.

    #105341
    Andrew Hughes
    Member
    • Total Posts 1904

    Does that mean its legal for a bird to shoot a member of the Royal Family?

    #105342
    dave jay
    Member
    • Total Posts 3386

    Not unless they are royal themselves, like Princess Anne and then yes !

    #105343
    absolution
    Member
    • Total Posts 214

    Dont try to get rid of them – its a well known fact that being crapped on by pigeons (or any birds) can bring good fortune – so quickly log onto betfair or run down to the bookies and see if it works ;)

    #105344
    lollys mate
    Member
    • Total Posts 625

    Tie a cat to the arial.

    #105345
    gamble
    Participant
    • Total Posts 2728

    <br>  :old:

    Lolly you are well versed in the word flap<br> Hvae you ever looked under a pidgeon’s ?

    #105346
    gamble
    Participant
    • Total Posts 2728

     :old:

    Lolly put the kettle on<br> Lolly’s girl took it off again.<br> I’d swear it was a morgue in here<br> if I couldn’t see the hairs on my hand<br> rising up.<br> It’s gone so quiet since <br> the two dancing girls from ABBA<br> left us.<br> I might just sit on this slab

    #105347
    madman marz
    Member
    • Total Posts 707

    Gets yourself a few cats, the sight of any cat hanging around a garden would keep any bird away, because they know whats good for them.

    Better than any dog, no rodents, no pigeons, and they won’t s**t
    all over the place.

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